Post
by Pat » Fri Aug 27, 2004 11:58 pm
Dear Miss Ol"Gramma,
I really need to have a word with you. I have been stuck in my garden for months now, and it's all your fault! In early May, one of your precious dogs found it's way into my yard and made a bee line right to the red plaid shirt I was wearing. Needless to say, I couldn't move, didn't have a cell phone to call for help - I was stuck, and your nice little doggie was just grinning from ear to ear. I have been living on roots and berries, anything edible within arms reach. Sure I lost lots of weight, got one heck of a sunburn, along with a bite from every bug on the planet. I looked like one of those poor excuses for a human "raised by wolves"!
Finally, thank heaven, the skies smiled on me. Yesterday a wonderous event occurred - just as my huge. bright red Lord Baltimore hibiscus bud was about to open, a meter reader , splendidly outfitted in a ratty looking bright red pocket tee, crossed paths. You should have heard the squabble. Your poor excuse for a dog got sooooo excited - it's tail started spinning at least 126 miles per hour, causing him to lift into the air at least 23 feet - and now the best part - WHAT A BEAUTIFUL EXPLOSION!!!!! Well, I certainly didn't need that kind of shower, and I didn't even try to explain to the meter reader what had just happened, he never would have understood anyway. Now I am looking thru cataloges, hoping somebody from Wonderland has invented a portable puffer, 'cause next time (and there better not be one), I ain't gonna be nice!
Sincerely, Pat
P.S. I am sure glad this latest level of yours was so nice and short and sweet, but it doesn't make up for the trouble you have caused me.
Last edited by
Pat on Mon Aug 30, 2004 12:28 am, edited 1 time in total.