M.A.W.

Cat · Post by **Cat** » Mon Mar 07, 2005 8:57 pm

Mothers in History Throughout the centuries, mothers have been given
their children plenty of good advice and notable quotes. Here's just
a small humorous sampling:

PAUL REVERE'S MOTHER: I don't care where you think you have to go,
young man. Midnight is past your curfew!

MONA LISA'S MOTHER: After all that money your father and I spent on
braces, Mona, that's the biggest smile you can give us?

HUMPTY DUMPTY'S MOTHER: Humpty, If I've told you once, I've told you a
hundred times not to sit on that wall. But would you listen to me?Noooo!

COLUMBUS'S MOTHER: I don't care what you've discovered, Christopher.
You still could have written!

BABE RUTH'S MOTHER: Babe, how many times have I told you -- quit
playing ball in the house! That's the third broken window this week!

MICHAELANGELO'S MOTHER: Mike, can't you paint on walls like other
children? Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off
the ceiling?

NAPOLEON'S MOTHER: All right, Napoleon. If you aren't hiding your report
card inside your jacket, then take your hand out of there and prove it!

CUSTER'S MOTHER: Now, George, remember what I told you -- don't go
biting off more than you can chew!

ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S MOTHER: Again with the stovepipe hat, Abe? Can't you
just wear a baseball cap like the other kids?

BARNEY'S MOTHER: I realize strained plums are your favorite, Barney,
but you're starting to look a little purple.

MARY'S MOTHER: I'm not upset that your lamb followed you to school,
Mary, but I would like to know how he got a better grade than you.

BATMAN'S MOTHER: It's a nice car, Bruce, but do you realize how much
the insurance is going to be?

GOLDILOCKS'S MOTHER: I've got a bill here for a busted chair from the
Bear family. You know anything about this, Goldie?

LITTLE MISS MUFFET'S MOTHER: Well, all I've got to say is if you don't
get off your tuffet and start cleaning your room there'll be a lot more
spiders around here!

ALBERT EINSTEIN'S MOTHER: But, Albert, it's your senior picture.
Can't you do something about your hair? Styling gel,mousse, something...?

GEORGE WASHINGTON'S MOTHER: The next time I catch you throwing money
across the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!

JONAH'S MOTHER: That's a nice story, but now tell me where you've really
been for the last three days.

SUPERMAN'S MOTHER: Clark, your father and I have discussed it, and we've
decided you can have your own telephone line. Now will you quit spending
so much time in all those phone booths?

THOMAS EDISON'S MOTHER: Of course I'm proud that you invented the
electric light bulb, Thomas. Now turn off that light and get to bed!

CAT

Liz Mayhew · Post by **Liz Mayhew** » Tue Mar 08, 2005 7:37 am

Great jokes Cat

and the Power of Women one is so appropriate as it's International Women's Day today!

Liz

Cat · Post by **Cat** » Tue Mar 08, 2005 3:12 pm

Great jokes Cat

and the Power of Women one is so appropriate as it's International Women's Day today!

Thanks Lillian, glad you enjoyed them.

the cat · Post by **the cat** » Tue Mar 08, 2005 3:16 pm

There great,

Davimad · Post by **Davimad** » Wed Mar 09, 2005 12:44 pm

I enjoyed reading through all that.

Thanks Cat.

Cat · Post by **Cat** » Wed Mar 09, 2005 2:44 pm

Glad all of you women enjoyed The Mothers in History. Thanks , it was quite interesting.

Davimad · Post by **Davimad** » Wed Mar 09, 2005 3:37 pm

Just something I was reading reminded me of this.

When my husband was a young single man living with his parents, he used to dread his mother asking what he'd like in his packed lunch.
He told her once that he enjoyed bananas, she packed them in his lunchbox every day for six months!

I wondered why he had such long arms.

The first time I was asked over for dinner, John's mother gave us roast beef with all the trimmings. I complimented her on the lovely meal and John whispered. "You are gonna regret saying that."

He was right, I got the same meal every visit for 14 years

ann3120 · Post by **ann3120** » Fri Mar 11, 2005 5:19 am

..... and on the subject of mothers, maybe you'll enjoy this one:

THIS SHOULD END ALL "3 BEARS" STORIES

Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the table, he
looks into his small bowl. It is empty. "Who's been eating my porridge?!!"
he squeaks.

Papa Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair. He looks
into his big bowl, and it is also empty. "Who's been eating my Porridge?!!"
he roars.

Momma Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and yells, "How many times do we have to go through this with you idiots? It was Momma Bear who got up first, it was Momma Bear who woke everyone in the house, it was Momma Bear who made the coffee, it was Momma Bear who unloaded the dishwasher from last night, and put everything away, it was Momma Bear who went out in the cold early morning air to fetch the newspaper, it was Momma Bear who set the table, it was Momma Bear who put the cat out, cleaned the litter box, filled the cat's water and food bowls, and, now that you've decided to drag your sorry bear-bodies downstairs, and grace Momma Bear's kitchen with your grumpy presence, listen good, cause I'm only going to say this one more time...

"I HAVEN'T MADE THE DAMN PORRIDGE YET" !!

majic1 · Post by **majic1** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 5:19 am

This is a question, definitely, for the MAW thread.

What color are you?

I am turquoise - only because I love blue & especially love Blue Topaz - I think that is my favorite stone. But any kind of blue I like!!

So what color are you? Or think you are - and what color do you picture other MAW's as???? I have my thoughts as to what color other people are in my mind and will post them in a day or so!!!

ol'gramma · Post by **ol'gramma** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 5:38 am

I think you and I are the only ones still up! I hear snoring

This is a fun idea.....
I have a color chart that tells you what each color evokes or represents...and I can post that after everyone who cares to adds on.

I am definitely a blue person ...everything I like ends up that color.

O/G

majic1 · Post by **majic1** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 5:40 am

YOU are blue too, like me?? Now isn't that just the strangest thing! HA HA HA HA HA HA

ann3120 · Post by **ann3120** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 5:41 am

I'm still up, but on my way to bed.

I think I must be purple ! ! ! ! ! ! !

ol'gramma · Post by **ol'gramma** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 5:51 am

We 3 are all in an earlier time zone Ann, so we get to play longer.

I can see that you are most definitely purplel

O/G

majic1 · Post by **majic1** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 5:59 am

Now, dearies, don't forget - you can't break the rules - ONE color; cuz I just KNOW someone's going to say they are all the colors of the rainbow!

Only Stinky fits that description!

ann3120 · Post by **ann3120** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 6:00 am

I'd stay up and play longer if I could, but I have a husband that says it's bedtime
and that he can't sleep with any lights on -
yeah, right.
I can already hear him snoring.

I love blue too, but when I gave myself a pair of roller blades for my 50th birthday
(and braces, and boy !! that seems such a long time ago)
everything was black, purple amd turquose, and I've loved those colours ever since.
Right now, purple is winning.

Time to go - see you tomorrow.

ol'gramma · Post by **ol'gramma** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 6:08 am

I'd stay up and play longer if I could, but I have a husband that says it's bedtime
and that he can't sleep with any lights on -

He is going to have to go.

O/G

Liz Mayhew · Post by **Liz Mayhew** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 8:03 am

My favourite colour is the clear green of the sea in Cornwall where we go camping and surfing for our holidays.

Liz

popo · Post by **popo** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 8:32 am

I like blue too, but not any sort of blue, not pale blue, or navy blue, or royal blue. It has to be electric blue. That piercing, metallic blue they paint cars.

the cat · Post by **the cat** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 9:39 am

Good morning ladies.

your up early or late.

Lilac is my favorite color.
As far as rainbows go, I do like to see them.

Davimad · Post by **Davimad** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 11:26 am

popo wrote:I like blue too, but not any sort of blue, not pale blue, or navy blue, or royal blue. It has to be electric blue. That piercing, metallic blue they paint cars.

That's the colour of my car Pauline, they call it lazer blue.

My favourite colour goes with my particular mood at the time.

Red or blue. Mostly red, what does that tell you about me OG?

ann3120 · Post by **ann3120** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 2:00 pm

Liz Mayhew wrote:My favourite colour is the clear green of the sea in Cornwall where we go camping and surfing for our holidays.

Liz

I know just what you mean, Liz. So many of my summer holidays were spent in Cornwall. We used to stay at a summer boarding house at Praa Sands, and then later my parents rented the Capstan Cottage at Sennen. I think Cornwall will always be one of my favourite places in the world. It was so unspoiled back then - no fences and carparks, and so few people.

janetgalle · Post by **janetgalle** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 4:03 pm

Red orange or yellow
.............if I had to pick one?
Orange.

jg

ol'gramma · Post by **ol'gramma** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 4:29 pm

M.A.D. wrote:

Red or blue. Mostly red, what does that tell you about me OG?

UH OH

Davimad · Post by **Davimad** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 4:31 pm

Go on, tell me I'm fiery and hot tempered, slinky and sexy.

ol'gramma · Post by **ol'gramma** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 4:38 pm

Slinky has a color?

The only slinkies I know about are metal.

Davimad · Post by **Davimad** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 4:43 pm

Slinky can mean figure hugging clothes or being alluring.

What is slinky metal?

popo · Post by **popo** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 4:53 pm

Slinkies are those long, spring things that walk down stairs.

Come to think of it you do look like a slinky.

ol'gramma · Post by **ol'gramma** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 4:54 pm

A Slinky is a toy, originally made out of thin metal that is all coiled like a spring. You could set it on the top step and it would 'walk' all the way down.

You don't have a Slinky as a kid?

(I got rid of the signature...I am just a plain Jayne.)

O/G

majic1 · Post by **majic1** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 4:54 pm

Oh, Maureen - you know, SLINKY - the toy! Although they do have plastic ones now that come in colors, but they don't work as well.

majic1 · Post by **majic1** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 4:59 pm

Here's a picture

M.A.W.

Mothers in History Quotes