DP I was awake until 1:00 last night and then I fell asleep instantly. I dreamed I was in a contest for flipping whole wheat pancakes while upside down for as long as possible, but then a helicopter on fire sweeps me off the rope which I'm tied to to be upside down and I fly into a giant bird's nest full of crowns and clocks.
A baby chick approaches and starts belching worm-filled headphone-flavoured ice cream at me, which is when my glasses turn into a wall that grows arms and starts chasing me.
I discover gravity has turned around and everything, including the oceans, are in space. But everyone in the area is alive. I float to the moon but a ninja turtle devours me.
I go unconscious but wake up in a quarter second in a bedroom of a nice house. When I open the curtains I see a path that goes on into the distance. I jump out the window and start walking.
2 hours later, I reach a huge can of soda and get sucked inside, where my alarm clock starts lecturing me on the essential unimportance of brushing your teeth while juggling whole wheat pancakes, which feels distantly related to the start of my dream somehow...
I wake up and realize my alarm clock is upside down somehow...what happened? I still don't know. This was all last night.
EDIT:

Not really around much these years.